Comments on: Onely Watershed Moments

By: Pioneering Singles’ Advocate Dr. Bella DePaulo BlogCrawls onto Onely! « Onely: Single and Happy

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 07:02:30 +0000

[...] with a bang! Today singles’ advocate extraordinaire Dr. Bella DePaulo relates some personal watershed moments when she realized she didn’t have to find a “Sex and Everything Else Partner” if [...]

By: Singlutionary

Singlutionary — Sat, 18 Apr 2009 05:02:39 +0000

Chest wrinkles and herpes? Oh heck. I would much rather work on my garden where something decent actually grows. There are some really gross experiences to be had in the world when you think its necessary to find a mate even if you don’t particularly want one.

My moment: I thought I was actually going to get married to my ex-therapist (and all my problems would, of course, be solved by this union) only to find out that he was a cheating, lazy psychopath. I had everything I ever wanted in the palm of my hand and I had never been more relieved to see that dream crumble. This was even before he exhibited his truly nutzo behavior.

I’ve always been functionally fine with being single but I definitely felt the social stigma. Until I started Singlutionary and found Onely and friends, that is!

By: onely

onely — Sat, 18 Apr 2009 01:55:59 +0000

eeewwwwwww to that chest wrinkles comment. eeewwwwwwwww.

By: onely

onely — Sat, 18 Apr 2009 01:55:59 +0000

eeewwwwwww to that chest wrinkles comment. eeewwwwwwwww.

By: autonomous

autonomous — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 20:36:20 +0000

That’s funny about the first date- but why on earth would anyone discuss it, unless they had it? When I was 36 it seemed all my friends needed to set me up with someone in an effort to see me married, and feeling adventurous I went on half a dozen blind dates. Those are some of the very best stories now because while my friends were well-meaning, I had to work hard to not take personally their splendid “choices” for me. One friend actually chided me for being too picky after her most recent attempted intro was with a guy who complemented me on not having any chest-wrinkles yet. (um, we were standing amongst many people who overheard that gem)

Another watershed moment is realizing that at this juncture of my life, picky = quality. I don’t want to spend time with people who are toxic to my well-being; whether it’s a lover, a friend, or my family of origin. Like Lauri mentions above- it’s easy to get married and procreate-hey, I live in Reno- much harder to get unmarried (well, easier in Reno too but usually it’s just a mess)