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Guest Post: A Take on How to Be Single and Happy December 5, 2013

Posted by Onely in Everyday Happenings, Food for Thought, Guest Bloggers.
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 Copious Readers, remember that we always like guest posts expressing different writers’ feelings on being single and happy (or not). Here is one from Veronica Hayes. We welcome comments!
–Christina and Lisa
 
How To Be Single And Happy
The title of this article is how to “be” happy, not stay happy. So what you will read is about the present – the here and now. It’s about looking around and realizing you have made a sane and conscious decision to be single at this point in your life. Today is not forever….which means you’ll be able to change your mind. People do it all the time – men and women, young and old. If there’s one constant in life, it’s change.Stay Active

Being single and happy means taking advantage of the fact that your primary responsibility is to yourself. It also means that your time is to yours to do with as you choose, so choose wisely. Sitting around the house playing video games, going online, or watching TV are all options. A great option for most people is to get up and out on a regular basis and mingle with other single people. Join a gym club, find local social events, or get involved with sports teams – professional or local. Staying active will keep you from wondering what to do with all the free time you have available to you.

Maximize Your Surroundings
Since you live alone, there is no one else to consider when choosing the type of sound system, size of the big screen TV, or how comfortable the chairs should be. There is no one else’s mess to clean up, so you take care of yourself. Take advantage of this and create the type of single person environment that makes a statement about you and being single. I once lived in an apartment that had a massive living room which I turned into an entertainment room, complete with big screen TV, surround sound stereo, and uber-comfortable furniture for lounging. I didn’t worry about someone rearranging things or telling me to turn the volume down.

Be Real!
This may take some time, but it would behoove you to evaluate whether you’re truly happy or not with your life.  You’re single for a reason – whether by choice or by circumstance. If you’re not feeling at ease with your current situation, then find ways to come to terms with it, whether it’s for the short term or long term, and make your life one worth waking up to in the morning. Trying to deny reality will only come back to bite you in the end, so find out what works for you, and don’t be afraid to run with it!

Re-evaluate Regularly
As I said in the beginning, the one constant in life is change. You will be happier knowing that you have the option to change your mind – in a week, or a month, or a year. Between now and then, re-evaluate your overall situation. For example, you may not be financially ready to move from singleness to marriage or some state in between. Set aside some time and examine your finances to see if the direction you are headed will enable you to make the transition. Remember, you may decide after a while that having money and freedom is a nice combination.

Conclusion

There are advantages to both being single and being married. They are just different advantages, and the older you get the more likely you will be to accept your singleness or start looking for a life partner. But keep in mind that going from single to married, married to single, over and over again will only make you wonder if you really know what you’re doing. Whatever changes you decide to make, always be your own best friend.
Veronica Hayes writes all about dating, relationships and personal empowerment. Her recent work is on The Top 10 Online Psychology Programs.

Comments»

1. Elena - April 3, 2014

sorry but I don’t get this. It is written from a perspective as if money and careers and social pressure didn’t matter at all. “make your life one worth waking up to in the morning”: Every morning I wake up to the pressures of having to go to work in a job I no longer like – and the pressures of trying to find a new job which i DO like which is hard, because the job market doesn’t seem to value 15 years of professional experience if I try to stray from the career path even only a tiny little bit, to do what I like and not what everybody seems to think would be the logical next step in my career. I know very well what kind of life i would like to wake up to every morning but it involves going back to University full time (No part-time studying possible, I’ve asked them) so – not possible, because who’s going to pay for my living costs.
I don’t know where this idea comes from that single people have lots of money and freedom at the same time. Gaining lots of money normally means loosing your freedom, and it turns out that choosing freedom over lots of money may not mean having “a little less” money, but seriously endangering your ability to support yourself. Which after all, being single, is what you need to do. I find it harder economically to be single than to get married. Why should someone not be in the financial positon to marry? After all, in a couple you get to share most of the cost (having children is another matter. But even then, a relationship means that there are two people earning money for the family not just one).

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