Single? Don’t Sweat It! May 1, 2009
Posted by Onely in Food for Thought, single and happy.Tags: benefits of being single, Dr. Howard LeWine, person smells like cheese
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In this eye-opening Men’s Health article, Howard LeWine, M.D. advises and comforts a woman who says,
“My husband has started sweating profusely when he is asleep. His sweat has a strong cheesy smell and I can no longer tolerate it.”
I hope that poor man doesn’t have one of the serious conditions that LeWine mentions. But I am also sort of allowed to make fun of him, because I too went through a phase where I smelled of Muenster cheese. It emanated from my elpits–you know, the insides of your elbows. I couldn’t move my arms without catching whiffs. So having smelled Human Muenster myself, I know how terribly that poor woman must have suffered, inhaling the huge slag of sweaty cheese all night, with the odor pooling in particular under the sheets like a fart.
Copious Readers, what other exposures to terrible bodily emanations do we avoid by being single?
Christina
Onely.Org 
Wow. I just enjoy having my own bed most nights of the week. I like that I only have to share a bed a couple of nights a week. The SO’s morning breath is not picnic….although I imagine neither is mine!
I have glade plug-ins all over the apartment, great deodorant and a good supply of body spray, so I think I usually avoid torturing those who venture into my humble abode.
I don’t miss the bitchy twin sister who took over me due to chronic sleep deprivation: my ex had severe sleep apnea and the Darth Vader sounding breathing mask/ or snoring/ flopping about was a major bummer. Sometimes I would awaken to find myself hugging the edge of the mattress. I seriously wouldn’t move in with a man unless I had my own room. There is nothing like a good night’s sleep on a regular basis, and the evil twin has gone back into her cave.
Rogaine.
I also want to add, I really hope my sweat smells like grapefruit. I actually pay good money for grapefruit bodywash.
hahaha this gave me such a laugh, thank you! Yes, I think being able to roll around the bed any which way you choose, along with no fear of any sent monsters attacking or offending your nose, is a definite plus 🙂
I peed my pants laughing. Almost. I don’t know what I avoid (except for being woken up in the middle of the night by a horny boyfriend biting me hard, on the neck) but I do know that I love my own farts and being able to release them shamelessly is one of my favorite single pleasures.
Although I am pretty sure that nothing would change were I coupled. I would love to be in a relationship with a man who thought fart competitions were fun. But the rest of the time I’d expect him to NOT act like he was in the 5th grade.