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Onely Commits Heteronormativity (Again) April 5, 2012

Posted by Onely in Food for Thought, Heteronormativity.
Tags: , , ,

I’m beginning to worry I’m a subconscious heteronormahole, one of those annoying people who frame everything in the world in a hetero couple matrix. Regular readers will recall that in the past I’ve made unintentionally singlist or heteronormative remarks about housing and parenting.

Well, folks, I did it again. Recently I saw a hypnotist for assistance with handling medical issues, but as you know these guys are famous–in TV world at least–for dredging up all sorts of nastiness from the subconscious. Even. . . heteronormativity in a woman who has spent her blogging career railing against couple-maniacs and calling them names?

What happened was: The hypnotist sat me in a fluffy recliner. To the right of me was a matching fluffy recliner. In the tiny room, the recliners were the centerpiece and the empty chair to the right of me was very close and very obvious.

“Why do you have two chairs here?” I asked, after the session. I was groggy. (After all, I had just spent fifteen minutes being told to relax and visualize happy stuff. )  “Why? Do you hypnotize couples together? Like therapy?”

“No.” She gave me the same look I would have given myself, had I been completely lucid. “Sometimes friends want to do it together. Often coworkers. Not so much couples, at least not for therapy.”

Of course. Why would two chairs automatically suggest a couple to me? Why wouldn’t any number of other combinations of peoplehood want to try hypnosis together? Copious Readers, what would you have thought if you’d seen two chairs close side by side in a small dim hypnotist’s office?


Photo credit: the-hypnotic.blogspot.com


1. Solitary Diner - April 6, 2012

I would’ve thought exactly the same thing as you. I can’t honestly imagine myself going to any sort of counseling or hypnotherapy with a coworker or friend.

Onely - April 8, 2012

Thanks SD. Though now I’m actually curious as to what joint hypnosis would be like and I wish I could find someone to go with me. . . = )

2. olivia reading - April 9, 2012

I’m afraid I’m guilty of this kind of thing very often too, Onely. I think the best we can do is be open to changing our frames when they’re pointed out. The only benefit I’ve found of this annoying trait of mine is that being aware of it helps me be more tolerant of other people’s normative language/attitudes.

Onely - April 9, 2012

I think you’re exactly right. We all have prejudices ingrained in us from societal exposure. We don’t have to obliterate them from our unconscious (in fact, we we often can’t), but as long as we are aware of them and take conscious steps not to act on them, that’s what’s most important and feasible. Thanks for your support. = ) = )

3. tehomet - April 16, 2012

I would have thought the same as you. And then I would have though it was a bit weird to be hypotised with anyone else. I mean, I don’t go to the dentist in company. 🙂

Onely - April 17, 2012

But mightn’t it be more fun to go to the dentist with someone? Then you could hear their screams from the next chair.
Ok or maybe not. = )

4. Autumn (@autumnpaz) - May 13, 2012

Honestly, I can’t imagine going to hypnotherapy with a coworker! I suppose I’d go with a friend if we were trying to deal with the same concern? But yeah, like Tehomet, I’d prefer to go alone–I already have a hard time doing the whole clear-your-mind thing (how do you clear your mind? without falling asleep? HOW?) and imagine that being there with someone else would only add to it.

5. Nikki B - May 18, 2012

Hey at least we’re thinking about it, right? That’s further than most people get…. 😀

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