Book Review: The Challenge of Being Single March 15, 2009
Posted by Onely in book review, Reviews.Tags: bella depaulo, eleanor hoover, health insurance for singles, loneliness, marie edwards, marriage mythology, penguin group, Rachel's Musings, signet publishing, single people, singles' health, taxes on singles, the challenge of being single, thomas wolfe, why aren't you married, women's rights
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Marie Edwards and Eleanor Hoover. The Challenge of Being Single: For Divorced, Widowed, Separated, and Never-Married Men and Women. Signet, New American Library: New York 1975.
This book review will be done in the style of movie previews.
California, 1971.
IN A WORLD where the ideal woman is still a homemaker and the ideal man her breadwinner, where “computer dating” means you fill out a paper form and send it via snail mail to a company for matching via punch card, where divorced women can’t pay their bills, and where landlords turn away singles and unmarried couples–ONLY ONE WOMAN has the courage to stand up for the rights of single people everywhere. Facing down bitter myths about unpaired people, FEARLESS PSYCHOLOGIST MARIE BABARE EDWARDS launches her workshops “THE CHALLENGE OF BEING SINGLE” through the University of Southern California. Then, with the help of INTREPID JOURNALIST ELEANOR HOOVER, she turns her workshop experiences into a ground-breaking book that, well, judge for yourself from these excerpts. Here’s Edwards in her own words, (more…)
Degree in Coupling, anyone? November 3, 2008
Posted by Onely in As If!, book review, Food for Thought, Reviews.Tags: Ellen Byerrum, Jim Lehrer, Mary Kay Ricks, PhD, Stephen Goodwin, Susan Fraser King
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On Saturday, I attended a luncheon at the Fairfax Country Club (there is no way to not make that sound snooty–but if I say the event raised money for scholarships, does that help?) where Susan Fraser King, Ellen Byerrum, Mary Kay Ricks, Stephen Goodwin and Jim Lehrer talked about their recent books and about writing in general. All the authors were entertaining speakers and I left lusting after each of their books.
However, the hostess in her intro made an interesting unOnely remark: (more…)
Gay Marriage perpetuating stigma against non-heteronormativeholes? September 26, 2008
Posted by Onely in book review, Food for Thought, Heteronormativity, Reviews.Tags: gay marriage, gay normalization, michael turner, ron hogan, the trouble with normal
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On our in-process “Things We Like” page, Lindabeth recommended an interesting-sounding book by Michael Warner, The Trouble With Normal. I don’t know if we’ll end up reviewing this book, but it definitely raises a very interesting point! Ron Hogan’s below Amazon.com review says Warner argues that when people push for gay marriage, they are trying to normalize gays according to the current culturally sanctioned standards of monogamy and matrimony. But according to Warner, really this just paves the way for trying to normalize other people who don’t fit into heterosexual coupled roles. (more…)
BOOK REVIEW: Cheating at Solitaire, by Ally Carter September 17, 2008
Posted by Onely in book review, Pop Culture: Scourge of the Onelys, Reviews.Tags: ally carter, cheating at solitaire, single
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Carter, Ally. Cheating at Solitaire. New York: Penguin, 2005
On the back of the book:
Self-help guru Julia James is so good at being single that she’s become famous for it–advising women that they don’t need a man to be happy. Then the unthinkable happens. Just when her newest book, 101 Ways to Cheat at Solitaire, is about to hit stores, a trumped-up piece of gossip linking her to a gorgeous actor hits the papers. Their pictures are splashed all over the tabloids, and now Julia’s credibility is about to hit rock bottom. But she isn’t going down without a fight. Unless, that is, the actor is going down with her.
I picked this book up because I wanted to see whether Julia ends up with the gorgeous actor. That’s what usually happens–the strong single woman is celebrated as long as in the end she ends up with a good man (Must Love Dogs, Hope Floats–oh we all know there are tons of examples out there, even if I can’t think of them right now). I was expecting Cheating at Solitaire would be different, because on the back of the book the author professes herself a proud singleton: (more…)
REVIEW: Pride and Joy; The Lives And Passions of Women Without Children, by Terri Casey September 4, 2008
Posted by Onely in book review, Reviews.Tags: childfree, Pride and Joy: The Lives and Passions of Women Without, Terri Casey, Women without Children
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Casey, Terri. Pride And Joy: The Lives And Passions Of Women Without Children. New York: Simon and Schuester, 2007
Casey presents inspiring descriptions of twenty-five women who have chosen not to have children. She describes the women’s hobbies, jobs, families, friends, pets, goals, dreams, and accomplishments so that their lives all sound as rich as–if not, dare I say it, richer than–the lives of women who did choose to have children. (more…)
REVIEW: SINGLED OUT, by Bella DePaulo–Why are matrimaniacs matrimaniacs? August 5, 2008
Posted by Onely in book review, Reviews, Singled Out, We like. . ..Tags: bella depaulo, discrimination, heteronormative, marriage mythology, prejudice, single mythology, Singled Out, singlism
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DePaulo, Bella. Singled Out, How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized, and Ignored, and Still Live Happily Ever After. New York: St. Martin’s Press, 2006
(This is an ongoing, serial review, continued from an earlier post)
In Singled Out, DePaulo theorizes that “matrimaniacs” (people who fixate on the importance of marriage and coupling) belittle single people for the following reason:
Book Review: Singled Out, by Bella DePaulo July 21, 2008
Posted by Onely in book review, Reviews, Singled Out, We like. . ..Tags: bella depaulo, discrimination, heteronormative, marriage mythology, prejudice, single mythology, Singled Out, singlism
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DePaulo, Bella. Singled Out, How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized, and Ignored, and Still Live Happily Ever After. New York: St. Martin’s Press, 2006.
From Singled Out:
“Some components of singlism are built right into American laws and institutions, which means that neither coupled nor single people have any say about sustaining them. Take Social Security, for example. If you are a married person covered by Social Security and you die, your spouse can recieve your benefits. But if you are a single person who worked side by side with the married person at the same job for the same number of years and you die, no other adult can receive your benefits. Your money goes back into the system.”
How could I have never asked myself: Why? DePaulo explores why few people question our culture’s ingrained bias toward coupledom, and why we should start. (more…)
BOOK REVIEW: Full Frontal Feminism, by Jessica Valenti July 11, 2008
Posted by Onely in book review, Reviews.Tags: Books, feminism, feministing, full frontal feminism, jessica valenti
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Valenti, Jessica. Full Frontal Feminism: A Young Woman’s Guide to Why Feminism Matters. Seal Press, 2007:
“Value yourself for what the media doesn’t–your intelligence, your street smarts, your ability to play a kick-ass game of pool, whatever. So long as it’s not just valuing yourself for your ability to look hot in a bikini and be available to men, it’s an improvement.”
Full Frontal Feminism‘s text skips along while it imparts knowledge–a rare enough combination. The book condenses the contents of a thirteen-page bibliography into colloquial prose, presenting vivid example after vivid example of why we all (women *and* men) need to identify as feminists and buck the ridiculous stereotype that feminists are always hairy-legged man-haters. (Not that it isn’t sometimes delightful to forego shaving for weeks on end during the winter.) (more…)
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Food for Thought! SINGLED OUT: Beware! Your Work Won’t Love You Back (An Academic’s Take) August 13, 2008
Posted by Onely in book review, Food for Thought, Reviews, Singled Out.Tags: academia, academic work, being married in academia, being single, bella depaulo, career choices, childless, reader comments, single in academia, your work won't love you back
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DePaulo, Bella. Singled Out, How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized, and Ignored, and Still Live Happily Ever After. New York: St. Martin’s Press, 2006
(This is an ongoing exploration of Singled Out, continued from an earlier post)
In Chapter 7 of Singled Out, DePaulo debunks the myth that if single women spend too much time focused on a career and/or in school, they will miss out on all the ‘good’ partners out there, and that being career-minded means “slogging through ‘the trenches of corporate solitude'” instead of “gleefully and triumphantly crashing through the glass ceiling” (136). (more…)
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