TAKE ACTION: Speak Up For Health Care Reform August 8, 2009
Posted by Onely in As If!, blog reviews, Everyday Happenings, Singles Resource, Take action.Tags: health care reform for singles, HR 676, public health care option, single payer system, singletude
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Check out yet another thorough and engaging post from Clever Elsie at Singletude, this time about the upcoming vote on HR 676, a bill supporting a single payer health care system, where we are all covered by ONE taxpayer-funded public source. (Ooh, how very Scandinavian!) As always, Singletude has done her research and explains why she is a fan of this bill. I am a fan of single-payer too, but my reasoning is based more on my gut than my head, so I encourage our Copious Readers to go to Singletude for more details. (more…)
Worldwide Onelers: China’s Taiko–Nots. August 3, 2009
Posted by Onely in As If!, Look What Google Barfed Up, Secret Lives of the Happily Single, solo travel.Tags: china's space program, halitosis relationship, spouse forbids something, taikonauts
8 comments
According to this BBC news article, Chinese taikonauts have to meet a series of criteria in order to go into space, including:
No Bad Breath!
No Body Odor!
No Scars That May Burst Open!
I understand the close confines of the spacecraft and fully support these criteria, having dated a guy with halitosis (though not, thank god, with exploding scars). But wait, there’s another requirement for taikonauts:
Your Spouse Must Approve!
Dr. Lillis Makes Onely Cry! Tell Him to Apologize! July 19, 2009
Posted by Onely in As If!, blog reviews, Heteronormativity.Tags: bella depaulo, Chancellor Internal Medicine, Dr. Christopher Lillis, marriage good for health, marriage healthy, marriage studies, singletude
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If any of our Copious Readers have friends who buy into the (flawed) “marriage-makes-healthy” studies, send them to Singletude‘s 15 July post. Singletude professionally and eruditely tears into Dr. Christopher Lillis, an internist with Chancellor Internal Medicine in Fredricksburg, Virginia. High on his recent nuptials, Dr. Lillis basically says that:
1) Everyone needs to get married so that their spouse will remind them to take care of their health! Singles wither away because they don’t remember go to the doctor!
2) People who remain single are likely to be genetically inferior to marrieds! (This isn’t at *all* like eugenics, is it? Lisa says, “What, is he going to measure the size of our heads?”)
3) Scientists who discount the “marriage-makes-healthy” studies are bitter because they never have time to get out of the lab to find true love! (Here he admits to hyperbole, but claims he’s allowed to say such things, because it’s his essay and he “just got hitched”. Careful of that bit and bridle, Doc. I can see it’s already squeezing on your brain.)
4) “Getting married reduces depressive symptoms, and getting divorced increases them.”
Onely Fights Office Singlism! Kind of! July 15, 2009
Posted by Onely in As If!, Everyday Happenings, Heteronormativity, Just Saying., Secret Lives of the Happily Single, single and happy.Tags: office chatter, responsible single people, single parents, singlism in the workplace, workplace singles discrimination
23 comments
I forget the context of our conversation, but at one point my coworker mentioned that single people don’t have any responsibilities. Now, before you send out the tar-and-feathering mob, loyal Copious Readers, let me say that this is one of my favorite coworkers and he has a knack for making out-of-place, over-the-top generalizations. But still, I felt the need to correct his statement.
“Single have responsibilities!” I said. “I have a mortage. And. . . and. . . a cat.” I winced. The C word seldom helps in a singles advocacy argument. But in the moment, I couldn’t think of any other responsibilities! Because to be honest, I am so enamoured of my independence that the feeling of freedom sometimes overshadows my to-do list. But Lisa rattled off my responsibilities to me later, in an email. She said we have “pretty much the same responsibilities as everyone else!” But for once I disagree with my intrepid co-blogger. (more…)
Heeere Comes the. . . Single Wedding Guest? July 9, 2009
Posted by Onely in As If!, Guest Posts.Tags: heteronormative, single women, singles at weddings, singlism, solo travel, wedding guests
27 comments
Onely likes guest posts by other writers who think about singles’ issues. The views expressed in our guest posts may or may not reflect Onely’s views, but we are always interested to hear from other singles advocates. Today’s post is by Autonomous, a regular reader and insightful commenter at Onely:
Wedding season is in full swing again, and the invitations are starting to arrive. While fewer in number the older I get, it seems to me that couples marrying for the first time in their 30’s to early 40’s have more grown-up tastes, more money to spend, and thereby the cost of attending their nuptials is more expensive as well. Unless someone quite close to me is marrying, job and finances necessitate I be selective about which events I can attend. The ones I do say yes to become my vacation for the season given the commitments of money; travel; time off work.
The most recent invite was not on parchment stationary and addressed to me personally, as in the traditional “Ms. — and Guest.” Rather, it arrived in the form of a bulk e-mail explaining travel tips to Napa wine country, providing a list of accomodations in the area, and offering a wine tour. The lodgings ranged from high-end cheap, to posh and very spendy. Going with the least expensive ($140/night- min. 2 nights) was a no-brainer. I began tallying the other anticipated costs: gas, pre-road-trip auto service just to be safe, and dining/groceries for several days, maybe a new pair of shoes. Of course, the wine tour must be factored in, because why drive 5 hours to wine country and not really enjoy myself? (more…)
First, Do No Heteronormativity: Onely at the Doctor’s July 9, 2009
Posted by Onely in As If!, Dating, Everyday Happenings, Food for Thought.Tags: divorced widowed single, new patient form, singles' health, supportive relationship
14 comments
My new doctor’s office provides holistic care based on an assessment of the patient’s physique, mentality, and life circumstances, as opposed to just treating isolated symptoms. It’s a progressive office, so I was intrigued to read this question on their patient intake form:
Are you? [ ] married [ ] divorced [ ] widowed [ ] single [ ] in a supportive relationship? (more…)
Friendshit June 17, 2009
Posted by Onely in As If!, Look What Google Barfed Up.Tags: cnn.com, single girl friendship, single women, singlism, weddings
9 comments
There are two strains of singlism: Type A, where the singlist actively disses single people, and Type B, where the singlist doesn’t even know they are commiting an “ism”. This CNN.com blog post, by a woman who mourns the inevitable death of her single-girl friendships now that she’s coupled, falls into the latter category. Yet somehow the author’s naivete doesn’t make the article any less horrifying–in fact, I would argue that her post is all the more horrifying because the assumptions she makes about single vs. coupled people are so insidious and (to her) unquestionable. She says she’s getting married a couple months, and:
. . . the days of “romancing” my friends — of luxuriating in their company all weekend long and most weekday evenings is (SIC) over. Given the choice — which, thankfully, I have now that my relationship is not a long-distance one — I’d rather spend most of my free time with my fiance. (more…)
Pop Culture, Scourge of the Onelys (Part 3 of 42,517): He’s Just Not That Into You June 10, 2009
Posted by Onely in "Against Love"...?, As If!, Heteronormativity, Pop Culture: Scourge of the Onelys.Tags: bad movies, desperation, exceptions, fuck you, he's just not that into you, proposals, single stereotyping sucks, single women, stupidity
20 comments
So this last weekend, under the guise of conducting “research” for Onely, I buckled down to watch the just-released-on-DVD He’s Just Not That Into You (HJNTIY for short).
And, OMG, this friendly little kid to the right expresses exactly how I feel about the movie: Fuck you, HJNTIY!
Yup, it’s that bad. Not only for what it implies about single people (more on that in a moment), but for its horrible acting, lack of a compelling story, and general waste of my time.
In theory, the movie should be pro-Onely — I mean, what better way for single (hetero) women (and gay men?) everywhere to get to a “happy” place than to accept that sometimes, he’s (really) just not that into you – and to decide that that’s okay? (more…)
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