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Some Onely Books: Trimberger and Patel October 22, 2008

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I haven’t read these, but they look great. I just ordered them today, as I continue my quest to personally fund several love handles on the heaving gut of the Amazon.com beast. Note that Lisa and I are interested in singlehood around the world–hence Lisa’s intriguing post about Iranian singles and the below mention of Patel’s book: (more…)

Once Onely, always Onely? October 21, 2008

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 Once Onely, always Onely? If Lisa or I start dating someone seriously to the point that they become our “significant other”, do we forfeit our Onely status? I say no. Even if I get married, I will still be Onely. It’s sort of like once you pay your dues, you get a lifetime membership. And that’s a good thing. Social Psychologist Bella DePaulo pithily validates my point

Americans now spend more years unmarried than married. But even if we spent only a sliver of our lives single, we should be able to use that sliver to pick any door or puncture any myth. . .

Corollary question: (more…)

Gay Unlike Me September 30, 2008

Posted by Onely in Everyday Happenings, Food for Thought.
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Yay! Another post where I get to reference Sex and the City! 

Remember the episode where Miranda’s boss sets her up with a lesbian, having assumed that she must be gay because he’s never seen her with a man? That happened to me! Except it was my neighbor who tried to set me up with her lesbian friend. She said, “But I never saw any men around your house, so I thought. . .” Her friend was very beautiful, so too bad for me I’m not gay. (more…)

Out of the Onely Closet September 25, 2008

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Lisa has already come out as Onely. She sent an email to her friends telling them about our new blog and inviting them to comment. I keep postponing sending out a corresponding email to my peeps. Why? (more…)

FAMILY AND MEDICAL LEAVE ACT: Heteronormative and Singlist September 23, 2008

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Copious Readership, did you know that the Family and Medical Leave Act is heteronormative and singlist? Lookie here:  (more…)

Coming Home Onely September 18, 2008

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Often it’s nice to come home to a smiling face, right? Sure. But our mission here at Onely is to seek, find, and relish those moments when significant others do not apply. 

When I was living with my then-boyfriend, when I came home from work he greeted me and wanted me to sit down on the couch and take a couple minutes to chat about our days. Sweet, right?

Yes, but I hated it. (more…)

BOOK REVIEW: Cheating at Solitaire, by Ally Carter September 17, 2008

Posted by Onely in book review, Pop Culture: Scourge of the Onelys, Reviews.
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Carter, Ally. Cheating at Solitaire. New York: Penguin, 2005

On the back of the book:

Self-help guru Julia James is so good at being single that she’s become famous for it–advising women that they don’t need a man to be happy. Then the unthinkable happens. Just when her newest book, 101 Ways to Cheat at Solitaire, is about to hit stores, a trumped-up piece of gossip linking her to a gorgeous actor hits the papers. Their pictures are splashed all over the tabloids, and now Julia’s credibility is about to hit rock bottom. But she isn’t going down without a fight. Unless, that is, the actor is going down with her.

I picked this book up because I wanted to see whether Julia ends up with the gorgeous actor. That’s what usually happens–the strong single woman is celebrated as long as in the end she ends up with a good man (Must Love Dogs, Hope Floats–oh we all know there are tons of examples out there, even if I can’t think of them right now).  I was expecting Cheating at Solitaire would be different, because on the back of the book the author professes herself a proud singleton:  (more…)

Cat People and Dog People September 11, 2008

Posted by Onely in Food for Thought, Singled Out.
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The terms “Cat Person” and “Dog Person” refer to someone who gravitates to a particular animal, not someone who likes one animal and dislikes another. Similar with Single Person and Coupled Person.  (more…)

Great Onely Activities, part 91-3v: THE PASSENGER SEAT September 9, 2008

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This week I drove five hours down to North Carolina, where my friend’s family had a beach house. I stopped in Williamsburg, Virginia on the way there and back, to see another friend. On the trip I realized the wonders of an empty passenger seat. (more…)

Pop Music, Scourge of the Onelies (part 715_e): I wuv my woogums September 1, 2008

Posted by Onely in As If!, Food for Thought, music review, Pop Culture: Scourge of the Onelys, We like. . ..
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Why are most pop songs about love? Because it’s a state fraught with emotion just begging to be released in song. Fine; I get that. But of all the pop songs about love, why are most of them about man-woman couple love? Because that’s the kind of love our world seems to place above all other kinds of love. Not fine; I don’t get that. (more…)

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