Insignificant others: A steppingstone to kids? April 10, 2009
Posted by Onely in Food for Thought, Just Saying., Your Responses Requested!.Tags: biological clock, discrimination against singles, marriage mythology, pairing up to have kids, single and happy, single men want kids, single parent adoption
27 comments
Copious Readers, what does it mean when otherwise Onely people–who don’t mind being single–are looking for a significant other just because they want to have kids? Is this a good reason to look for a significant other? Currently, our world is set up so that it’s a lot harder to raise children if you don’t have a partner. But it’s wrong that our society is set up like that. So are these people supporting a shoddy system when they first get married before having kids? Should more people consider adopting as singles? Or given the current sub-par state of benefits systems for single parents, is that unfair to the children? (more…)
Wife or Transgender Wife – Does the Category Matter? Your Responses Requested! April 6, 2009
Posted by Onely in Food for Thought, Heteronormativity, Your Responses Requested!.Tags: Chris Mason, death by exercise, James Mason, transgender
4 comments
A couple of months ago, I noticed this creepy headline:
I read the article and found the case stunning and bizarre: “A woman pleaded guilty to reckless homicide for exercising her 73-year-old husband to death in a swimming pool.”
A month passed, and I noticed another headline:
Having read the fine print of the first article, I knew immediately that this headline was referring to the same case. But I don’t understand why the “transgender” part of the story became headline-worthy. After all, the most interesting (read: disturbing!) part of this story is that the wife (Christine Newton-John, also known as Chris Mason ) exercised her husband (James Mason) to death.
There are plenty of details besides Chris/tine’s transgender identity that seem unrelated to the story, but which were nevertheless reported and may as well have been included in the headline, such as:
Another Feel-Good Post: YOUR RESPONSES REQUESTED! February 26, 2009
Posted by Onely in single and happy, Your Responses Requested!.Tags: new links, refreshments please, responsese requested, single and happy, singles resources, site reorganization, updates
5 comments
We’re fluffing pillows, people. I mean… As you may have noticed, we’ve been reorganizing, refreshing, and updating some of Onely’s links (scroll down and look to your right!) so as to more accurately reflect our ideological alignments and to highlight blogs dedicated to the practice of being single, as well as Web sites that provide (what we consider to be) important resources for single people. We’ve also tried to include, as often as possible, links to the blogs published by our regular readers (because we love you!).
We wanted to call your attention to this reorganization because we’d also like to solicit from you, Copious Readers, your responses and suggestions for anything we may have forgotten to include and/or missed altogether.We’d also appreciate your suggestions for singles resources (i.e., not blogs) that we have missed, particularly sites that are not designed for profit and are easily accessible to the general public. So, please — plug away!!!
In a related vein, we’ve also decided that we’re going to be profiling some of the blogs you see listed over in the side bar, so as to emphasize our desire for community and dialogue — two elements that are especially valuable when living Onely. We are so appreciative of the readership that has slowly but consistently been growing for us, we want to spread the love as much as possible!
We plan to limit our profiles to independent, non-profit blogs that deal specifically with being single — and are happy to hear any suggestions you have in this regard! We plan to post a new profile once every week or so, and we’ll notify whoever’s next, in case you want us to highlight anything in particular. We’re excited about this mini-project; what do you think?
Eagerly awaiting your responses,
— L & CC
Let’s Get This Over With As Quickly As Possible Day February 13, 2009
Posted by Onely in "Against Love"...?, As If!, Food for Thought, Heteronormativity, single and happy, Singled Out, Your Responses Requested!.Tags: feminist, hallmark, international quirkyalone day, LGTOWAQAP, new year's resolutions, nut sucking, progressive, singles awareness day, take our poll!, valentine's day, we love being single
11 comments
This is Onely’s first Valentine’s Day! Pt-oo! And that is us spitting on the Hallmark and De Beers mudworms who warped the holiday into its current overcommercialized incarnation.
What can Onely say about V-day, aka Let’s Get This Over With as Quickly As Possible Day, that hasn’t been said already? “The holiday is insulting to singles”; “not insulting to singles”; “worth celebrating”; “not worth celebrating” — blah, blah. (more…)
Onely Eats February 9, 2009
Posted by Onely in "Against Love"...?, Food for Thought, Your Responses Requested!.Tags: annie's mac and cheese, eating healthy and being single, meals for one, michael pollan, omnivore's dilemma
11 comments
For the last week or so, I have been RAVENOUS. I don’t know why. I have been consuming way too many carbs, as I know I shouldn’t, but those don’t fill me up either. Since I live alone, I don’t have anyone to cook for me or to share my food with. Sometimes, this means I don’t eat well, or at all, or at the right times, or in the right quantities. A lot of times I don’t get the nutrients I need. And when I do cook, it’s difficult to know how much to cook — usually I prepare more food than I need for a single meal and freeze everything that’s extra. I find myself wasting perishable food that can’t be frozen (like dairy), because I can’t eat it all before it spoils.
Priesthood, Celibacy, and Being Onely January 14, 2009
Posted by Onely in "Against Love"...?, Food for Thought, Heteronormativity, single and happy, Your Responses Requested!.Tags: catholicism, compulsory heterosexuality, Heteronormativity, marriage as sacrament, priesthood, single and awesome
13 comments
Christina recently pointed me to this very interesting article from the BBC about a priest reflecting on his choice to remain single. Father John Abberton explains that his decision to become a priest was a “positive thing not a negative thing.” In fact,
When I was sixteen and was thinking ahead to what my future would be, I certainly had images of myself as a married man with children. I don’t remember ever struggling with the denial of that. It was a progression into an attitude where I saw myself as being available to as many people as I could be available to and giving myself to the church.
Like many single people, Father John has chosen an admirable occupation and has devoted himself to work that he is passionate about and through which he can enhance the world around him in some very positive ways.
But then Father John’s tone changes slightly, as he compares himself to others who are single (but, ostensibly, not priests?):
I am single for a purpose and my feeling is in someway or another everyone who is single should be single for a purpose. I know there are some people who remain single because they say that is what they want. Although I don’t want to judge people, I think there is a worrying trend in some quarters of society towards a selfish single state.
Great Onelies in Real Time: Shanaz (YOUR RESPONSES REQUESTED) January 8, 2009
Posted by Onely in As If!, Everyday Happenings, Food for Thought, Great Onelies in Real Time, Heteronormativity, Profiles, Your Responses Requested!.Tags: gay, haircut, homophobia, iranian politics, lesbian, single, singlism
7 comments
This evening my hairdresser and I talked about being Onely. Shanaz likes men but is more interested in friends, her hair artistry, her daughter, her writing (Persian language commentary on Iranian politics), and just life. “I’m happiest without a boyfriend,” she says. At forty-something, she’s been married and coupled and single and even accidentally involved with a married man. And she chooses single.
But you know what’s coming next, don’t you? (more…)
Onely.Org 